Every story on this page is fabricated for comedic effect from a real headline. If it sounds real, that's the joke — not the news.
The news, exaggerated until it makes sense. Generated by AI, aimed at the present.
Pages are numbered from the oldest story, so a numbered page always holds the same stories it held the day you found it.
Officials say surviving an explosion in the concourse will now earn travelers status points redeemable toward future flights through the same airport.
A new oversight body patrols the galleries with rulers, pausing tours whenever one artist appears to be winning the exhibition by a quarter-inch.
The new Tip Integrity Board was meant to stop rogue leads from reaching police, but its inaugural report concluded the board itself requires further review.
The company says the contract will settle itself, one way or another.
The new press secretary will keep her old job, and the briefing room is simply relocating to where she already works.
A rocket-propulsion firm says the fastest way around investment rules is simply changing nationality twice a day.
Producers say the show must literally out-rich its characters, a mandate that is going about as well as budgeting advice usually does.
Officials promise instant replay, a pre-show commentary desk, and a live studio audience for viewers who don't want to miss a single angle.
Facing neighborhood questions about the unmarked building, the facility says it's simply leaning into the obvious comparison.
The new agency's mission statement reportedly ends the moment any answer threatens to appear.
Citing a threat that could theoretically reach any runway on Earth, defense officials unveil a new strategy built entirely around staying up there.
Inspired by this year's Chemistry Nobel, regulators have decided that if life leans one way, manufacturing should simply lean the other.